How do we treat deaf People ?

How do we treat deaf people ?

Increasingly I’m becoming more and more frustrated at my deafness (see blog entry for Nov 5th) but what is worse for me isn’t about not hearing the TV, radio or music; it actually isn’t even about not hearing people when they speak to me.

It actually two things at play here. Firstly, because the NHS doesn’t seem to have the capacity to cope since covid in Audiology departments, my hearing hasn’t been assessed for three and a half years now. As a consequence I have little clarity in my hearing despite two aids and in most conversations I have to ask people to repeat themselves but it makes me feel thick and stupid even though the other person may not intend that result.

Secondly some people can’t actually help themselves and register a mixture of surprise, that someone didn’t hear the question/statement etc. Again when I see eyebrows raised, exasperation on faces, see a big sigh, and then the statement etc repeated with a degree of impatience then I again I feel stupid and thick.

Ive known this all my life, especially at school (thinking of one teacher in particular). Snide comments made by fellow pupils, schoolwork incorrect because I didn’t hear the question all affected my confidence, and my blindness in my right eye didn’t help in lipreading.

This continued into working life but although two ear operations helped me enormously and have carried me through most of my adult life I’m now back at that childhood status of near deafness and its worse now. I may not have clarity any more but without the aids I only have silence (and trust me silence doesn’t always feel golden).

Chester is magnificent and the Hearing Dog community believe that HD (hearing dogs) help with confidence; to a large extent I think they do but in a strange perverse way they also turn the deaf person on themselves as its much easier to have a chat with him than risk not knowing what others have said. Also there are some even in the Church who resent my deafness. Several years ago a lady in a Church informed me that I shouldn’t be a Minister if I was deaf; when I pointed out that she too had hearing difficulties so should understand, apparently it was different as she didn’t want to pay me when I wasn’t catching all she said.

Reflecting on this tonight after a day in which I sensed/saw someones frustration at yet again having to repeat things has made me question why society and the church thinks less of deaf people; if we were to come across a blind person we wouldn’t have the same frustration but an increased desire to help. Someone with a serious medical condition wouldn’t be ignored in their views which I often feel I am because in a discussion it takes me longer to assess what I’m hearing and by the time I do the conversation has moved on.

I find deafness also increases tiredness and that leads to loss of concentration.

Please don’t read this as a rant to say “poor Mike”. that is NOT my intention; my intention is to simply encourage all of us, myself included, to be more understanding, tolerant and accepting

Ive taken to rereading this small booklet that the Methodist Church produced man-years ago. It opens with these words………

Hearing loss is not fatal……but its not much fun either…..and its mighty frustrating

to which I add “for all”